Thursday, April 30, 2009

Tale to Understand - The Importance of the 3R's - Reduce, Reuse and Recycle.

BUDDHA AND HIS DISCIPLE



Buddha, one day, was in deep thought about the worldly activities and the ways of instilling goodness in human beings. One of his disciples approached him and said humbly "Oh my teacher! While you are so much concerned about the world and others, why don't you look in to the welfare and needs of your own disciples also?"

Buddha : "OK.. Tell me how I can help you"

Disciple : "Master! My attire is worn out and is beyond the decency to wear the same. Can I get a new one, please?"

Buddha found the robe indeed was in a bad condition and needed replacement. He asked the store keeper to give the disciple a new robe to wear on. The disciple thanked Buddha and retired to his room. A while later; he went to his disciple's place and asked him "Is your new attire comfortable? Do you need anything more?”

Disciple : "Thank you my Master. The attire is indeed very comfortable. I need nothing more"

Buddha : "Having got the new one, what did you do with your old attire?"

Disciple : "I am using it as my bed spread"

Buddha : "Then.. hope you have disposed off your old bed spread"

Disciple : " No.. no.. master. I am using my old bedspread as my window curtain"

Buddha : " What about your old Curtain?"

Disciple : "Being used to handle hot utensils in the kitchen"

Buddha : "Oh.. I see.. Can you tell me what did they do with the old cloth they used in Kitchen"

Disciple : "They are being used to wash the floor."

Buddha : " Then, the old rug being used to wash the floor...?"



Disciple: "Master, since they were torn off so much, we could not find any better use, but to use as a twig in the oil lamp, which is right now lit in your study room."

Buddha smiled in contentment and left for his room.


REFLECTION

Environmental problems have become so complex that many individuals feel they can have no effect on them. Problems like global warming, hazardous waste, loss of rain forests, endangered species, acid rain, the ozone layer, the municipal waste crisis may feel out of our control. But each of us have to do our part to keep our environment safe, clean and healthy and for that recyling makes a big difference!

Reclying saves natural resources such as wood,water and minerals, saves energy because less energy is used to manufacture brand new products and saves our environment; for example - production of less greenhouse gases as industries burn fewer fossil fuels while manufacturing new products. Likewise the benefits of reducing, reusing and reclying is numerous.

Just like the disciple in the above story, we must all attempt to find the best use of all our resources at home and in office. We need to handle wisely all the resources earth has bestowed us with, both natural and material so that they can be saved for the generations to come. Reserve Consumption !!! Save the world, be responsible!

Always remember the 3R's - REDUCE, REUSE,RECYCLE!

Coins !!! (Funny Joke)‏

1 ladki @ railway station


Waiting for 1/2 hr... gets bored

coin nikala, coin weighing machine mein dala...

58 Kgs



coin nikala

Sandal utari, side mein rakhkhi

coin weighing machine mein dala....

56 Kgs


coin nikala

Jacket utara, side mein rakhkha

coin weighing machine mein dala....

53 Kgs


coin nikala

Dupatta utara, side mein rakhkha

coin weighing machine mein dala....

52 Kgs


Coin khatam!

Side mein baitha bhikari bola...


"Tu chalu rakh. Coin main dalta hu"

A wonderful story‏

A woman came out of her house and saw 3 old men with long white beards sitting in her front yard. She did not recognize them. She said "I don't think I know you, but you must be hungry. Please come in and have something to eat."


"Is the man of the house home?", they asked.





"No", she replied. "He's out."



"Then we cannot come in", they replied.



In the evening when her husband came home, she told him what had happened.



"Go tell them I am home and invite them in!"



The woman went out and invited the men in"



"We do not go into a House together," they replied.



"Why is that?" she asked.



One of the old men explained: "His name is Wealth," he said pointing to one of his friends, and said pointing to another one, "He is Success, and I am Love." Then he added, "Now go in and discuss with your husband which one of us you want in your home."



The woman went in and told her husband what was said. Her husband was overjoyed. "How nice!!", he said. "Since that is the case, let us invite Wealth. Let him come and fill our home with wealth!"



His wife disagreed. "My dear, why don't we invite Success?"



Their daughter was listening from the other corner of the house. She jumped in with her own suggestion: "Would it not be better to invite Love? Our home will then be filled with love!"



"Let us heed our daughter's advice," said the husband to his wife.



"Go out and invite Love to be our guest."



The woman went out and asked the 3 old men, "Which one of you is Love? Please come in and be our guest."



Love got up and started walking toward the house. The other 2 also got up and followed him. Surprised, the lady asked Wealth and Success: "I only invited Love, Why are you coming in?"



The old men replied together: "If you had invited Wealth or Success, the other two of us would've stayed out, but since you invited Love, wherever He goes, we go with him. Wherever there is Love, there is also Wealth and Success!!!!! !"

IF YOUR MANAGEMENT HAS DECIDED TO SCREW YOU, THERE IS NO ESCAPE..... :-

Once SONIA GANDHI, L.K. Advani and Laloo Prasad Yadav were
travelling in an autorickshaw. They met with an accident and all three of
them died.
Yama Raja was waiting for this moment at the doorstep of death.

He asks Mrs GANDHI and Advani to go to HEAVEN.

But, for Laloo, Yama had already decided that he should be sent to HELL.
Laloo is not at all happy with this decision.

He asks Yama as to why this discrimination is being made. All the three of
them had served the public. Similarly, all took bribes, all misused public
positions, etc.

Then why the differential treatment?

He felt that there should be a formal test or an objective evaluation before
a decision is made; and should not be just based on opinion or pre-conceived
notions.



Yama agrees to this and asks all the three of them to appear for an English
test.

Mrs GANDHI is asked to spell " INDIA " and she does it correctly.

Advani is asked to spell " ENGLAND " and he too passes..

It is Laloo's turn and he is asked to spell " CZECHOSLOVAKIA "..

Laloo protests that he doesn't know English.

He says this is not fair and that he was given a tough question and thus
forced to fail with false intent.



Yama then agrees to conduct a written test in Hindi (to give another chance
assuming that Laloo should at least feel that Hindi would provide an equal
platform for all three)..

Mrs GANDHI is asked to write "KUTTA BOLA BHOW BHOW". She writes it easily and
passes.

Advani is asked to write "BILLY BOLI MYAUN MYAUN". He too passes.

Laloo is asked to write "BANDAR BOLA GURRRRRR.... ."
Tough one. He fails again.



Laloo is extremely unhappy.

Having been a student of history (which the other two weren't),he now
requested for all the 3 to be subjected to a test in history

Yama says OK but this would be the last chance and that he would not take
any more tests.

Mrs GANDHI is asked: "When did India get Independence ?". She replied "1947" and
passed.

Advani is asked "How many people died during the independence struggle?".

He gets nervous. Yama asked him to choose from 3 options: 100,000 or 200,000
or 300,000.
Advani catches it and says 200,000 and passes.

It's Laloo's turn now.
'

'

'
Yama asks him to give the Name and Address of each of the 200,000 who died
in the struggle.
Laloo accepts defeat and agrees to go to HELL.

Moral of the story: IF YOUR MANAGEMENT HAS DECIDED TO SCREW YOU, THERE IS NO ESCAPE..... :-

15 Laws of Life From Swami Vivekananda‏

15 Laws of Life From Swami Vivekananda




1. Love Is The Law Of Life: All love is expansion, all selfishness is contraction. Love is therefore the only law of life. He who loves lives, he who is selfish is dying. Therefore, love for love's sake, because it is law of life, just as you breathe to live.

2. It's Your Outlook That Matters: It is our own mental attitude, which makes the world what it is for us. Our thoughts make things beautiful, our thoughts make things ugly. The whole world is in our own minds. Learn to see things in the proper light.

3. Life is Beautiful: First, believe in this world - that there is meaning behind everything. Everything in the world is good, is holy and beautiful. If you see something evil, think that you do not understand it in the right light. Throw the burden on yourselves!

4. It's The Way You Feel: Feel like Christ and you will be a Christ; feel like Buddha and you will be a Buddha. It is feeling that is the life, the strength, the vitality, without which no amount of intellectual activity can reach God.

5. Set Yourself Free: The moment I have realised God sitting in the temple of every human body, the moment I stand in reverence before every human being and see God in him - that moment I am free from bondage, everything that binds vanishes, and I am free.

6. Don't Play The Blame Game: Condemn none: if you can stretch out a helping hand, do so. If you cannot, fold your hands, bless your brothers, and let them go their own way.

7. Help Others: If money helps a man to do good to others, it is of some value; but if not, it is simply a mass of evil, and the sooner it is got rid of, the better.

8. Uphold Your Ideals: Our duty is to encourage every one in his struggle to live up to his own highest idea, and strive at the same time to make the ideal as near as possible to the Truth.

9. Listen To Your Soul: You have to grow from the inside out. None can teach you, none can make you spiritual. There is no other teacher but your own soul.

10. Be Yourself: The greatest religion is to be true to your own nature. Have faith in yourselves!

11. Nothing Is Impossible: Never think there is anything impossible for the soul. It is the greatest heresy to think so. If there is sin, this is the only sin - to say that you are weak, or others are weak.

12. You Have The Power: All the powers in the universe are already ours. It is we who have put our hands before our eyes and cry that it is dark.

13. Learn Everyday: The goal of mankind is knowledge... now this knowledge is inherent in man. No knowledge comes from outside: it is all inside. What we say a man 'knows', should, in strict psychological language, be what he 'discovers' or 'unveils'; what man 'learns' is really what he discovers by taking the cover off his own soul, which is a mine of infinite knowledge.

14. Be Truthful: Everything can be sacrificed for truth, but truth cannot be sacrificed for anything.

15. Think Different: All differences in this world are of degree, and not of kind, because oneness is the secret of everything.

Tuesday, April 28, 2009

Classic Short Stories

THE HARE AND THE TORTOISE


A tortoise one day met a hare who made fun of her. "My, my, you move so slowly, you will never get far!"

The tortoises, upset by the hare's manner, said, "Let's have a race and see who is faster."

The hare laughed and said, "You must be joking! But all right, we'll see who reaches the other side of the hill first." Off he ran, leaving the tortoise far behind.

After a while, the hare stopped to wait for the tortoise to come long. He waited and waited till he felt sleepy. "I might as well take a nap," he thought. "Even if she catches up with me, I can easily win the race." So he lay down under a shady tree and closed his eyes.

When the tortoise passed the sleeping hare, she walked on slowly but steadily. By the time the hare woke up, the tortoise was near the finishing line. He ran as fast as he could, but he could not catch up with the tortoise.

MORAL: Slow and steady can win the race.





Short Story Collection for Children: THE WOLF AND THE LAMB


A lamb was grazing with a flock of sheep one day. She soon found some sweet grass at the edge of the field. Farther and farther she went, away from the others.

She was enjoying herself so much that she did not notice a wolf coming nearer to her. However, when it pounced on her, she was quick to start pleading, "Please, please don't eat me yet. My stomach is full of grass. If you wait a while, I will taste much better."

The wolf thought that was a good idea, so he sat down and waited. After a while, the lamb said, "If you allow me to dance, the grass in my stomach will be digested faster." Again the wolf agreed.

While the lamb was dancing, she had a new idea. She said, "Please take the bell from around my neck. If you ring it as hard as you can, I will be able to dance even faster."

The wolf took the bell and rang it as hard as he could. The shepherd heard the bell ringing and quickly sent his dogs to find the missing lamb. The barking dogs frightened the wolf away and saved the lamb's life.

MORAL: The gentle and weak can sometimes be cleverer than fierce and strong.





THE FOX AND THE GRAPES


It was a sunny day and fox was walking across the fields. Soon he came to a vineyard. As he came nearer, he could see some bunches of juicy grapes.

The fox looked carefully around him. He had to make sure that he was safe from the hunters. He decided to steal some before anyone came along.

He jumped upwards but he could not reach the grapes. He jumped again as high as he could. He still could not reach them. The grapes were just too high for him!

He was not ready to give up. He backed off, took some running steps and leapt into the air towards the grapes. Again he failed to reach them.

It was getting dark, and he was getting angry. His legs hurt with all that running and jumping. At last he stopped trying.

As he walked away, he said to himself, "I don't really want those grapes. I'm sure they are too sour to eat."

MORAL: Sometimes when we cannot get what we want, we pretend that it is not worth having.


Classic Short Stories: THE THIRSTY CROW


One hot day, a thirsty crow flew all over the fields looking for water. For a long time, she could not find any. She felt very weak, almost giving up hope.

Suddenly, she saw a water jug below her. She flew straight down to see if there was any water inside. Yes, she could see some water inside the jug!

The crow tried to push her head into the jug. Sadly, she found that the neck of the jug was too narrow. Then she tried to push the jug down for the water to flow out. She found that the jug was too heavy.

The crow thought hard for a while. Then looking around her, she saw some pebbles. She suddenly had a good idea. She started picking up the pebbles one by one, dropping each into the jug. As more and more pebbles filled the jug, the water level kept rising. Soon it was high enough for the crow to drink. Her plan had worked!

MORAL: If you try hard enough, you may soon find an answer to your problem.

Short Story Collections for Kids: THE MILKMAID


A milkmaid was on her way to the market to sell some milk from her cow. As she carried the large jug of milk on top of her head, she began to dream of all the things she could do after selling the milk.

"With that money, I'll buy a hundred chicks to rear in my backyard. When they are fully grown. I can sell them at a good price at the market."

As she walked on, she continued dreaming, "Then I'll buy two young goats and rear them on the grass close by. When they are fully grown, I can sell them at an even better price!"

Still dreaming, she said to herself, "Soon, I'll be able to buy another cow, and I will have more milk to sell. Then I shall have even more money..."

With these happy thoughts, she began to skip and jump. Suddenly she tripped and fell. The jug broke and all the milk spilt onto the ground.

No more dreaming now, she sat down and cried.

MORAL: Do not count your chickens before they are hatched.

A story worth reading and sharing!‏

Worth reading.................

A boy was born to a couple after eleven years of marriage.
They were a loving couple and the boy was the gem of their eyes. When the boy was around two years old,
one morning the husband saw a medicine bottle
open. He was late for office so he asked his wife to cap
the bottle and keep it in the cupboard. His wife, preoccupied in the kitchen totally forgot the matter.

The boy saw the bottle and playfully went to the bottle
fascinated by its color and drank it all. It happened to be a poisonous medicine meant for adults in small dosages. When the child collapsed the mother hurried him to the hospital. He died. The mother was stunned. She was terrified how she was going to face her husband. When the distraught father came to the hospital and saw the dead child, he looked at his wife and uttered just five words.




QUESTIONS :

1. What were the five words ?

2. What is the implication of this story?

Scroll down to read....





ANSWER :

The husband just said 'I am with you Darling'. The
husband's totally unexpected reaction is a proactive behavior. The child is dead. He can never be brought back to life. There is no point in finding fault with the mother. Besides, if only he had taken time to keep the bottle away, this would not have happened. No one is to be blamed. She had also lost her only child. What she needed at that moment was consolation and sympathy from the husband. That is what he gave her.

If everyone can look at life with this kind of perspective,
there would be much fewer problems in the world. 'A journey
of a thousand miles begins with a single step.' Take off all your
envies, jealousies, unforgiveness, selfishness, and fears. And you will find things are actually not as difficult as you
think.



MORAL OF THE STORY

This story is really worth reading. Sometimes we
spend time in asking who is responsible or whom to blame, whether in a relationship, in a job or with the people we know. By this way we miss out some warmth in human relationship.

Monday, April 27, 2009

Anger and Love‏

Hope, u will like it...!


A man was polishing his new car, his 4 yr old son picked up a stone &
scratched on the side of the car.

In anger, the furious Man took his child's hand & hit it many times,
not realizing he was using a wrench.

At the hospital, the child lost all his fingers due to multiple fractures.

When the child saw his father....with painful eyes he asked 'Dad when
will my fingers grow back?'

The man was so hurt and speechless.

He went back to the car and kicked it many times. Devastated by his
own actions... sitting in front of the car he looked at
the scratches, His son had written 'LOVE YOU DAD'.

Next day that man committed suicide...

Anger and Love have no limits...
Always remember .....
"Things are to be used and people are to be loved"
but the problem in today's world is ....
"People are being USED & Things are being LOVED"

Have a Nice Day !!




"There are always three sides of an argument- Your side, My side and the Right side"

Perception Story

Perception Story





One day, the father of a very wealthy family took his son on a trip to the country with the express purpose of showing him how poor people live.



They spent a couple of days and nights on the farm of what would be considered a very poor family.



On their return from their trip, the father asked his son, "How was the trip?"



"It was great, Dad."



"Did you see how poor people live?" the father asked.



"Oh yeah," said the son.



"So, tell me, what you learned from the trip?" asked the father.



The son answered:



"I saw that we have one dog and they had four.



We have a pool that reaches to the middle of our garden and they have a creek that has no end.



We have imported lanterns in our garden and they have the stars at night.



Our patio reaches to the front yard and they have the whole horizon.



We have a small piece of land to live on and they have fields that go beyond our sight.



We have servants who serve us, but they serve others.



We buy our food, but they grow theirs.



We have walls around our property to protect us, they have friends to protect them."



The boy's father was speechless.



Then his son added, “Thanks Dad for showing me how poor we are."







Isn't perception a wonderful thing?



If we all saw everything the same way, there is hardly anything to learn



Next time someone disagrees with you remember that it is an opportunity to learn a new perception.

A Touching tale

Touching tale that may bring tears to your eyes
A poignant story depicting love, concern and understanding. Read on





In Phoenix, Arizona, a 26-year-old mother stared down at her 6 year old
son, who was dying of terminal leukemia.



Although her heart was filled with sadness,
She also had a strong feeling of determination.
Like any parent, she wanted her son to grow up & fulfill all his dreams.
Now that was no longer possible.

The leukemia would see to that.
But she still wanted her son's dream to come true.

She took her son's hand and asked,
'Billy, did you ever think about what you wanted to be once you grew up?
Did you ever dream and wish what you would do with your life?'

'Mommy, I always wanted to be a fireman when I grew up.'

Mom smiled back and said,


'Let's see if we can make your wish come true.'

Later that day she went to her local fire Department in Phoenix, Arizona,


where she met Fireman Bob, who had a heart as big as Phoenix.

She explained her son's final wish and asked if it might be possible


to give her 6 year-old son a ride around the block on a fire engine.

Fireman Bob said,

'Look, we can do better than that.
If you'll have your son ready at seven o'clock Wednesday morning,


we'll make him an honorary Fireman for the whole day.
He can come down to the fire station, eat with us,
go out on all the fire calls, the whole nine yards!
And if you'll give us his sizes,
we'll get a real fire uniform for him,
with a real fire hat - not a toy -- one-with the emblem of the Phoenix Fire
Department on it,
a yellow slicker like we wear and rubber boots.'

'They're all manufactured right here in Phoenix,
so we can get them fast.'





Three days later Fireman Bob picked up Billy,
dressed him in his uniform
and escorted him from his hospital bed to the waiting hook and ladder
truck.

Billy got to sit on the back of the truck
and help steer it back to the fire station.
He was in heaven.


There were three fire calls in Phoenix that day
and Billy got to go out on all three calls.

He rode in the different fire engines,
the Paramedic's' van,
and even the fire chief's car.

He was also videotaped for the local news program.

Having his dream come true,
with all the love and attention that was lavished upon him,
so deeply touched Billy, that he lived three months longer than any doctor
thought possible.



One night all of his vital signs began to drop dramatically.
The head nurse, who believed in the hospice concept - that no one should
die alone,
began to call the family members to the hospital.

Then she remembered the day Billy had spent as a Fireman,
so she called the Fire Chief and asked if it would be possible
to send a fireman in uniform to the hospital to be with Billy as he made
his transition.

The chief replied, 'We can do better than that.
We'll be there in five minutes. Will you please do me a favor?
When you hear the sirens screaming
and see the lights flashing,
will you announce over the PA system that there is not a fire?'

'It's the department coming to see one of its finest members one more time.

And will you open the window to his room?'

About five minutes later,
a hook and ladder truck arrived at the hospital
and extended its ladder up to Billy's third floor open window------ --
16 fire-fighters climbed up the ladder into Billy's room.

With his mother's permission,
they hugged him and held him and told him how much they LOVED him.

With his dying breath,
Billy looked up at the fire chief and said,

'Chief, am I really a fireman now?'

'Billy, you are, and the Head Chief, God, is holding your hand,' the
chief said


With those words, Billy smiled and said,
'I know, He's been holding my hand all day,


and the angels have been singing.'

He closed his eyes one last time.

Too गुड.............Sethusamudram

Sethusamudram

The Lord surveyed the Ram Setu and said "Hanuman, how diligently and
strenuously you and your vanara sena had built this bridge several
centuries back. It is remarkable that it has withstood the ravages of
the climatic and geographical changes over centuries. It is indeed an
amazing feat especially considering the fact that a bridge at Hyderabad
built by Gammon using latest technology collapsed the other day even
before they could stick the posters on its pillars."

Hanuman with all humility spoke "Jai Sri Ram, it is all because of your
grace. We just scribbled your name on the bricks and threw them in the
sea and they held. No steel from TISCO or cement from Ambuja or ACC was
ever used. But Lord, why rake up the old issue now."

Ram spoke "Well, Hanuman some people down there want to demolish the
bridge and construct a canal. The contract involves lot of money and lot
of money will be made. They will make money on demolition and make more
money on construction. "

Hanuman humbly bowed down and said "Why not we go down and present our case"

Ram said "Times have changed since we were down there. They will ask us
to submit age proof and we don't have either a birth certificate or
school leaving certificate. We traveled mainly on foot and some times in
bullock carts and so we don't have a driving license either. As far as
the address proof is concerned the fact that I was born at Ayodhya is
itself under litigation for over half a century, If I go in a traditional attire with bow and arrow, the ordinary folks may recognize me but Arjun Singh may take me to be some tribal and, at the most, offer a seat at IIT under the reserved category. Also, a God cannot walk in dressed in a three-piece suit and announce his arrival. It would make even the devotees suspicious. So it is dilemma so to say."

"I can vouch for you by saying that I personally built the bridge."

"My dear, Anjani putra, it will not work. They will ask you to produce
the lay-out plan, the project details, including financial outlay and
how the project cost was met and the completion certificate. Nothing is
accepted without documentary evidence in India . You may cough but unless a doctor certifies it, you have no cough. A pensioner may present
himself personally but the authorities do not take it as proof. He has
to produce a life-certificate to prove that he is alive. It is that
complicated. "

"Lord can't understand these historians. Over the years you have given
darshan once every hundred years to saints like Surdas, Tulsidas, Saint
Thyagaraja, Jayadeva, Bhadrachala Ramdas and even Sant Tukaram and still they disbelieve your existence and say Ramayana is a myth. The only
option, I see, is to re-enact Ramayana on earth and set the government
records straight once for all."

Lord smiled "It is not that easy today. Ravan is apprehensive that he
may look like a saint in front of Karunanidhi. I also spoke to his mama
Mareechan, who appeared as a golden deer to tempt Sita maiyya when I was in the forest and he said that he won't take a chance of stepping on
earth as long as Salman Khan is around. !"

Too गुड.............Sethusamudram

Sethusamudram

The Lord surveyed the Ram Setu and said "Hanuman, how diligently and
strenuously you and your vanara sena had built this bridge several
centuries back. It is remarkable that it has withstood the ravages of
the climatic and geographical changes over centuries. It is indeed an
amazing feat especially considering the fact that a bridge at Hyderabad
built by Gammon using latest technology collapsed the other day even
before they could stick the posters on its pillars."

Hanuman with all humility spoke "Jai Sri Ram, it is all because of your
grace. We just scribbled your name on the bricks and threw them in the
sea and they held. No steel from TISCO or cement from Ambuja or ACC was
ever used. But Lord, why rake up the old issue now."

Ram spoke "Well, Hanuman some people down there want to demolish the
bridge and construct a canal. The contract involves lot of money and lot
of money will be made. They will make money on demolition and make more
money on construction. "

Hanuman humbly bowed down and said "Why not we go down and present our case"

Ram said "Times have changed since we were down there. They will ask us
to submit age proof and we don't have either a birth certificate or
school leaving certificate. We traveled mainly on foot and some times in
bullock carts and so we don't have a driving license either. As far as
the address proof is concerned the fact that I was born at Ayodhya is
itself under litigation for over half a century, If I go in a traditional attire with bow and arrow, the ordinary folks may recognize me but Arjun Singh may take me to be some tribal and, at the most, offer a seat at IIT under the reserved category. Also, a God cannot walk in dressed in a three-piece suit and announce his arrival. It would make even the devotees suspicious. So it is dilemma so to say."

"I can vouch for you by saying that I personally built the bridge."

"My dear, Anjani putra, it will not work. They will ask you to produce
the lay-out plan, the project details, including financial outlay and
how the project cost was met and the completion certificate. Nothing is
accepted without documentary evidence in India . You may cough but unless a doctor certifies it, you have no cough. A pensioner may present
himself personally but the authorities do not take it as proof. He has
to produce a life-certificate to prove that he is alive. It is that
complicated. "

"Lord can't understand these historians. Over the years you have given
darshan once every hundred years to saints like Surdas, Tulsidas, Saint
Thyagaraja, Jayadeva, Bhadrachala Ramdas and even Sant Tukaram and still they disbelieve your existence and say Ramayana is a myth. The only
option, I see, is to re-enact Ramayana on earth and set the government
records straight once for all."

Lord smiled "It is not that easy today. Ravan is apprehensive that he
may look like a saint in front of Karunanidhi. I also spoke to his mama
Mareechan, who appeared as a golden deer to tempt Sita maiyya when I was in the forest and he said that he won't take a chance of stepping on
earth as long as Salman Khan is around. !"

This is absolutely amazing - and makes perfect sense!!

It's been said that God first separated the salt water from the fresh, made dry land, planted a garden, made animals and fish... all before making a human. He made and provided what we'd need before we were born. These are best & more powerful when eaten raw. We're such slow learners...

God left us great clues as to what foods help what part of our body!
God's Pharmacy! Amazing!
A sliced Carrot looks like the human eye. The pupil, iris and radiating lines look just like the human eye... and YES, science now shows carrots greatly enhance blood flow to and function of the eyes.
A Tomato has four chambers and is red. The heart has four chambers and is red. All o f the research shows tomatoes are loaded with lycopine and are indeed pure heart and blood food.
Grapes hang in a cluster that has the shape of the heart. Each grape looks like a blood cell and all of the research today shows grapes are also profound heart and blood vitalizing food.
A Walnut looks like a little brain, a left and right hemisphere, upper cerebrums and lower cerebellums. Even the wrinkles or folds on the nut are just like the neo-cortex. We now know walnuts help develop more than three (3) dozen neuron-transmitters for brain function.
Kidney Beans actually heal and help maintain kidney function and yes, they look exactly like the human kidneys.
Celery, Bok Choy, Rhubarb and many more look just like bones. These foods specifically target bone strength. Bones are 23% sodium and these foods are 23% sodium. If you don't have enough sodium in your diet, the body pulls it from the bones, thus making them weak. These foods replenish the skeletal needs of the body.
Avocadoes, Eggplant and Pears target the health and function of the womb and cervix of the female - they look just like these organs. Today's research shows that when a woman eats one avocado a week, it balances hormones, sheds unwanted birth weight, and prevents cervical cancers. And how profound is this? It takes exactly nine (9) months to grow an avocado from blossom to ripened fruit. There are over 14,000 photolytic chemical constituents of nutrition in each one of these foods (modern science has only studied and named about 141 of them).
Figs are full of seeds and hang in twos when they grow. Figs increase the mobility of male sperm and increase the numbers of Sperm as well to overcome male sterility.
Sweet Potatoes look like the pancreas and actually balance the glycemic index of diabetics.
Olives assist the health and function of the ovaries
Oranges, Grapefruits, and other Citrus fruits look just like the mammary glands of the female and actually assist the health of the breasts and the movement of lymph in and out of the breasts.
Onions look like the body's cells. Today's research shows onions help clear waste materials from all of the body cells. They even produce tears which wash the epithelial layers of the eyes. A working companion, Garlic, also helps eliminate waste materials and dangerous free radicals from the body..

The Monk's Secret

A man is driving down the road and breaks down near a monastery. He goes to the monastery, knocks on the door, and says, My car broke down. Do you think I could stay the night?

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The monks graciously accept him, feed him dinner, and even fix his car. As the man tries to fall asleep, he hears a strange sound; a sound like no other that he has ever heard. The next morning, he asks the monks what the sound was, but they say, We can't tell you because you're not a monk.

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The man is disappointed but thanks them anyway and goes about his merry way. Some years later, the same man breaks down in front of the same monastery.
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The monks again accept him, feed him, and even fix his car.
That night, he hears the same strange mesmerizing sound that he had heard years earlier.

>

The next morning, he asks what the sound was, but the monks reply,
We can't tell you because you're not a monk.


>

The man says, all right, all right. I'm dying to know.

If the only way I can find out what that sound was is to become a monk, how do I become a monk?


>

The monks reply, you must travel the earth and tell us how many blades of grass there are and the exact number of sand pebbles. When you find these numbers, you will become extremely learned and a monk.

>

The man sets about his task. Some forty-five years later, he returns and knocks on the door of the monastery. He says, I have travelled the earth and devoted my life to the task demanded and have found what you had asked for. There are 371,145,236, 284,232 blades of grass and 231,281,219, 999,129,382 sand pebbles on the earth.


>

The monks reply, "congratulations, you are correct, and you are now considered a monk" .

We shall now show you the way to the sound.

>

The monks lead the man to a wooden door, where the head monk says, the sound is behind that door.



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The man reaches for the knob, but the door is locked. He asks, May I have the key ?
>

The monks give him the key, and he opens the door.


>

Behind the wooden door is another door made of stone. The man requests the key to the stone door.



The monks give him the key, and he opens it only to find a door made of ruby. He asks for another key from the monks, who provide it. Behind that door is another door, this one made of sapphire.

And so it went on until the man had gone through doors of emerald, silver, topaz, and amethyst.

Finally, the monks say, This is the key to the last door .

>

>

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The man ( who is now a monk ) is relieved to be at the end. He unlocks the door,

turns the knob, and behind that door he is astonished to find the source of that

strange sound. It is truly an amazing and
>
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But I can't tell you what it is because you're not a monk !.

हा हा Ha

"Classic definition & Cool Meanings in new dictionary "




1. Cigarette: A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.


2. Love affairs: Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five day test.


3. Marriage : It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master .


4. Divorce : Future tense of marriage .


5. Lecture : An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either".


6. Conference : The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.


7. Compromise : The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.


8. Tears : The hydraulic force by which masculine will-power is defeated by feminine water-power...


9. Dictionary : A place where divorce comes before marriage.


10. Conference Room : A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.


11. Ecstasy : A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.


12. Classic: A book which people praise, but do not read.


13. Smile : A curve that can set a lot of things straight.


14. Office : A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.


15. Yawn : The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.


16. Etc .: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.


17. Committee : Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.


18. Experience : The name men give to their mistakes.


19. Atom Bomb : An invention to end all inventions.


20. Philosopher : A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.


21. Diplomat : A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.



22. Opportunist : A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.


23. Optimist : A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See I am not injured yet."


24. Pessimist : - A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY .


25. Miser : A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.


26. Father: A banker provided by nature.


27. Criminal: A guy no different from the rest... except that he got caught.


28. Boss : Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.


29. Politician : One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.


30. Doctor : A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.


31. Computer Engineer : One who gets paid for reading such mails...



" You can't have any successes unless you can accept Failure "



Thief machine








In U.S. they invented a machine that catches thieves; they took it out to different countries for a test.

In U.S.A,

in 30 minutes, it caught 20 thieves;

In UK ,

in 30 minutes it caught 50 thieves;

In Spain ,

in 30 minutes it caught 65 thieves;

In Ghana ,

in 30 minutes it caught 600 thieves;

In India ,

in 15 minutes the machine was stolen!!! Jai Ho!!!

Story for Children -Power of Guru's Mantra Upadesh by Sri.Sri.Muralidhara Swamij

Once there lived a king who ruled the kingdom righteously and wisely. The people of the kingdom lived happily under his rule. His kingdom remained prosperous and wealthy in all ways. In spite of this the king had no peace of mind; He read many spiritual books to know the way to attain peace of mind. These spiritual books extolled the chanting of 'Rama! Rama!- through the chanting of 'Rama! Rama!' one enjoys peace of mind. He, therefore, began to chant Rama Nãma. But, to his disappointment he did not attain peace of mind.

It was at this time that a Mahatma visited his Court. The king informed him of his predicament. The Mahatma said to him, "I will give 'upadesa' (instruction) of a great Mantra to you. Keep doing japa of it! You will find peace."

The king asked the Mahatma, eagerly, "What is that Mantra?"
The Mahatma said, "I am going to give 'upadesa' of the Rama Mantra the japa of which will bestow all that one desires in this world and also joy in the higher world."

The king felt disappointed on hearing the words of the Mahatma and said quite indifferently, "Swami! It is this very Mantra that I have been doing japa of for the past so many days. But it has not been fruitful." The Mahatma said, "I will give 'upadesa' of that Mantra to you now. Do japa of it after receiving the 'upadesa' from me. You will find a difference in the result."

This did not, however, satisfy the king. He thought, 'is not the Mahatma suggesting the same Rama Nama that I have already been chanting daily? What difference can be had in the result by receiving it from him?' The Mahtama understood the thought running in the king's mind.

Turning to the army chiefs standing close by, the Mahatma said to them, "Arrest the king." At first, those present in the Royal Court thought that the Mahatma had uttered these words in a jest. But, when he repeatedly gave this order, the king became furious and ordered the army chiefs to arrest the Mahatma. The army chiefs at once arrested the Mahatma.

The Mahatma laughed aloud and pointed to the king, "I uttered the very same words to them. But they did not act. However, they acted as soon as you uttered these words to them. Have they not? The reason behind this is that you enjoy that right. There is a difference in response to the same words coming from you and from me. Likewise, the Lord has bestowed the right on me to do 'upadesa' of the Mantra to you. Therefore, there certainly would be a great difference in the 'phala' (fruit) if you do japa of the Rama Nama after receiving it through me. You will certain attain the peace of mind through my 'upadesa'."

Men's Logic ( FUNNY JOKE )

A man and his wife were in a court for their divorce case.


The Problem was who should get custody of the child.


The wife screamed and jumped up and said: "Your Honor. I brought The child into the world with all the pain and labor.


The child Should be in my custody."


The judge turned to the husband and said: "What do you have to Say in your defense?"


The man sat for a while contemplating. ..then slowly rose. "Your Honor... If I put a dollar in a Pepsi Vending Machine and a Pepsi Comes out...


Whose Pepsi is it... The machine's or mine?"

NAMES IN CELL PHONES??‏You might want to make a few changes after reading this....

NAMES IN CELL PHONES??

You might want to make a few changes after reading this........ .......

Be careful how you list names on your cell phone! This lady has changed how she lists her names on her mobile phone after her handbag was stolen. Her handbag which contained her mobile, credit card, purse...etc. ... was stolen..

20 minutes later when she called her husband, from a pay phone telling him what had happened, hubby says 'I received your text asking about our Credit Card PIN number and I've replied a little while ago.'

When they rushed down to the bank, the staff told them all the money was already withdrawn. The pickpocket had actually used the stolen hand phone to text '' hubby '' in the contact list and got hold of the PIN number. Within 20 minutes he had withdrawn all the money from the bank account.

Moral of the lesson:

Do not disclose the relationship between you and the people in your contact list. Avoid using names like Home, Honey, Hubby, Sweetheart, Dad, Mom etc......

And very importantly, when sensitive info is being asked thru texts,

Always CONFIRM by calling back the person

Also, when you receive a text from friends or family to meet them somewhere, be sure to call back to confirm that the message came from them. If you don't reach them, be very careful about going places to meet 'family and friends' who text you......... ......... .

PLEASE PASS THIS ON TO ALL OF YOUR FRIENDS!

Sunday, April 26, 2009

Love & Marriage ( Good stOry )‏

Love & Marriage




A student asks a teacher, "What is love?"









The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the wheat field and choose the biggest wheat and come back.



But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to
pick."

The student went to the field, go thru first row, he saw one big wheat, but he wonders....may be there is a bigger one later.

Then he saw another bigger one... But may be there is an even bigger one waiting for him.

Later, when he finished more than half of the wheat field, he start to realize that the wheat is not as big as the previous one he saw, he know he has missed the biggest one, and he regretted.

So, he ended up went back to the teacher with empty hand.

The teacher told him, "...this is love... You keep looking for a better one, but when later you realize, you have already miss the person...."






"What is marriage then?" the student asked.

The teacher said, "in order to answer your question, go to the corn field and choose the biggest corn and come back. But the rule is: you can go through them only once and cannot turn back to pick."

The student went to the corn field, this time he is careful not to repeat the previous mistake, when he reach the middle of the field, he has picked one medium corn that he feel satisfy, and come back to the
teacher.

The teacher told him, "This time you bring back a corn.... You look for one that is just nice, and you have faith and believe this is the best one you get....
This is marriage."*

The Son

The SON

This is great. Take a moment to read it; it will make your day!

The ending will surprise you.
Take my Son

A wealthy man and his son loved to collect rare works of art. They had everything in their collection, from Picasso to Raphael. They would often sit together and admire the great works of art..

When the Vietnam conflict broke out, the son went to war. He was very courageous and died in battle while rescuing another soldier. The father was notified and grieved deeply for his only son.

About a month later, just before Christmas, there was a knock at the door. A young man stood at the door with a large package in his hands.

He said, 'Sir, you don't know me, but I am the soldier for whom your son gave his life. He saved many lives that day, and he was carrying me to safety when a bullet struck him in the heart and he died instantly. He often talked about you, and your love for art.' The young man held out this package. 'I know this isn't much. I'm not really a great artist, but I think your son would have wanted you to have this.'

The father

opened the package. It was a portrait of his son, painted by the young man. He stared in awe at the way the soldier had captured the personality of his son in the painting. The father was so drawn to the eyes that his own eyes welled up with tears. He thanked the young man and offered to pay him for the picture. 'Oh, no sir, I could never repay what your son did for me. It's a gift.'

The father hung the portrait over his mantle. Every time visitors came to his home he took them to see the portrait of his son before he showed them any of the other great works he had collected.

The man died a few months later. There was to be a great auction of his paintings. Many influential people gathered, excited over seeing the great paintings and having an opportunity to purchase one for their collection.

On the platform sat the painting of the son. The auctioneer pounded his gavel. 'We will start the bidding with this picture of the son. Who will bid for this picture?'

There was silence.

Then a voice in the back of the room shouted, 'We want to see the famous paintings. Skip this one.'

But the auctioneer persisted. 'Will somebody bid for this painting? Who will start the bidding? $100, $200?'

Another voice angrily. 'We didn't come to see this painting. We came to see the Van Goghs,the Rembrandts - Get on with the

real bids!'

But still the auctioneer continued. 'The son! The son! Who'll take the son?'

Finally, a voice came from the very back of the room.. It was the longtime gardener of the man and his son. 'I'll give $10 for the painting..' Being a poor man, it was all he could afford.

'We have $10, who will bid $20?'

'Give it to him for $10. Let's see the masters.'

The crowd was becoming angry.. They didn't want the picture of the son.

They wanted the more worthy investments for their collections.

The auctioneer pounded the gavel. 'Going once, twice, SOLD for $10!'

A man sitting on the second row shouted, 'Now let's get on with the collection!'

The auctioneer laid down his gavel. 'I'm sorry, the auction is over.'


'What about the paintings?'


'I am sorry. When I was called to conduct this auction, I was told of a secret stipulation in the will. I was not allowed to reveal that stipulation until this time. Only the painting of the son would be auctioned. Whoever bought that painting would inherit the entire estate, including the paintings.


The man who took the son gets everything!'


God gave His son 2,000 years ago to die on the cross. Much like the auctioneer, His message today is: 'The son, the son, who'll take the son?'



Because, you see, whoever takes the Son gets everything.


FOR GOD SO LOVED THE WORLD HE GAVE HIS ONLY BEGOTTEN SON, WHO SO EVER BELIEVETH, SHALL HAVE ETERNAL LIFE...THAT'S LOVE


whatever you like, but remember that maybe 'one' of the people you might have taken the time to send this to, may be just the person who needs to hear this message. You have a choice to make.'



God Bless.

And then the fight started

My wife sat down on the couch next to me as I was flippingchannels. She asked, 'What's on TV?'
I said, 'Dust.'
And then the fight started...

My wife was hinting about what she wanted for our upcoming anniversary. Shesaid, 'I want something shiny that goes from 0 to 150 in about 3 seconds.'
I bought her a weighing scale.
And then the fight started...

When I got home last night, my wife demanded that I take her someplaceexpensive... so, I took her to a gas station.
And then the fight started...


My wife and I were sitting at a table at my high school reunion, and I kept staring at a drunken lady swigging her drink as she sat alone at a nearby table.
My wife asked, 'Do you know her?'
'Yes,' I sighed, 'She's my old girlfriend.
I understand she took to drinking right after we split up those many years ago, and I hear she hasn't been sober since.'
'My God!' says my wife, 'who would think a person could go on celebrating that long?'
And then the fight started...

I took my wife to a restaurant. The waiter, for some reason, took my order first.

"I'll have the strip steak, medium rare, please."
He said, "Aren't you worried about the mad cow?""
Nah, she can order for herself."
And then the fight started...

A woman is standing nude, looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feelhorrible; I look old, fat and ugly.
I really need you to pay me a compliment.'
The husband replies, 'Your eyesight's damn near perfect.'
And then the fight started.....

I tried to talk my wife into buying a case of Miller Lightfor $14.95.
Instead, she bought a jar of cold cream for $7.95.
I told her the beer would make her look better at night than the cold cream.
And then the fight started....


My wife asked me if a certain dress made her butt look big. I told her not as much as the dress she wore yesterday

And then the fight started.....

A man and a woman were asleep like two innocent babies.
Suddenly, at 3 o'clock in the morning, a loud noise came from outside.
The woman, bewildered, jumped up from the bed and yelled atthe man 'Holy crap. That must be my husband!'
So the man jumped out of the bed; scared and naked jumpedout the window.
He smashed himself on the ground, ran through a thorn bushand to his car as fast as he could go.
A few minutes later he returned and went up to the bedroomand screamed at the woman, 'I AM your husband!'
The woman yelled back, 'Yeah, then why were you running?'
And then the fight started.....


Saturday morning I got up early, quietly dressed, made mylunch, grabbed the dog, and slipped quietly into the garage.
I hooked up the boat up to the truck, and proceeded to backout into a torrential downpour.
The wind was blowing 50 mph, so I pulled back into the garage, turned on the radio, and discovered that the weather would be bad all day.
I went back into the house, quietly undressed, and slippedback into bed.
I cuddled up to my wife's back, now with a different anticipation, and whispered, 'The weather out there is terrible.'
My loving wife of 10 years replied, 'Can you believe my stupid husband is out fishing in that?'
And then the fight started ...

I asked my wife, "Where do you want to go for our anniversary?"
It warmed my heart to see her face melt in sweet appreciation. "Somewhere I haven't been in a long time!" she said..
So I suggested, "How about the kitchen?"
And that's when the fight started....

My wife and I are watching Who Wants To Be A Millionairewhile we were in bed. I turned to her and said, "Do you want to have sex?"
"No," she answered.
I then said, "Is that your final answer?"
She didn't even look at me this time, simply saying "Yes."
So I said, "Then I'd like to phone a friend."
And that's when the fight started.....


When our lawn mower broke and wouldn't run, my wifekept hinting to me that I should get it fixed. But, somehow I always had something else to take care of first: the truck, the car, e-mail, fishing, always something more important to me.
Finally she thought of a clever way to make her point. When I arrived home one day, I found her seated in the tallgrass, busily snipping away with a tiny pair of sewing scissors. I watched silently for a short time and then went into the house. I was gone only a few minutes. When I came out again I handed her a toothbrush.
'When you finish cutting the grass,' I said, 'you might as well sweep the driveway.'
And then the fight started...

Friday, April 24, 2009

Significance of 108

Significance of 108

The Indian Subcontinent rosary or set of mantra counting has 108 beads. 108 has been a sacred number in the Indian Subcontinent for a very long time. This number is explained in many different ways.

The ancient Indians were excellent mathematicians and 108 may be the product of a precise mathematical operation (e.g. 1 power 1 x 2 power 2 x 3 power 3 = 108) which was thought to have special numerological significance.

Powers of 1, 2, and 3 in math: 1 to 1st power=1; 2 to 2nd power=4 (2x2); 3 to 3rd power=27 (3x3x3). 1x4x27=108

Sanskrit alphabet: There are 54 letters in the Sanskrit alphabet. Each has masculine and feminine, shiva and shakti. 54 times 2 is 108.


Sri Yantra: On the Sri Yantra there are marmas where three lines intersect, and there are 54 such intersections. Each intersections has masculine and feminine, shiva and shakti qualities. 54 x 2 equals 108. Thus, there are 108 points that define the Sri Yantra as well as the human body. 9 times 12: Both of these numbers have been said to have spiritual significance in many traditions. 9 times 12 is 108. Also, 1 plus 8 equals 9. That 9 times 12 equals 108.


Heart Chakra: The chakras are the intersections of energy lines, and there are said to be a total of 108 energy lines converging to form the heart chakra. One of them, sushumna leads to the crown chakra, and is said to be the path to Self-realization.


Marmas: Marmas or marmastanas are like energy intersections called chakras, except have fewer energy lines converging to form them. There are said to be 108 marmas in the subtle body.


Time: Some say there are 108 feelings, with 36 related to the past, 36 related to the present, and 36 related to the future.


Astrology: There are 12 constellations, and 9 arc segments called namshas or chandrakalas. 9 times 12 equals 108. Chandra is moon, and kalas are the divisions within a whole. Planets and Houses: In astrology, there are 12 houses and 9 planets. 12 times 9 equals 108.


Gopis of Krishna: In the Krishna tradition, there were said to be 108 gopis or maid servants of Krishna .


1, 0, and 8: 1 stands for God or higher Truth, 0 stands for emptiness or completeness in spiritual practice, and 8 stands for infinity or eternity.


Sun and Earth: The diameter of the sun is 108 times the diameter of the Earth.


Numerical scale: The 1 of 108, and the 8 of 108, when added together equals 9, which is the number of the numerical scale, i.e. 1, 2, 3 ... 10, etc., where 0 is not a number. Smaller divisions: The number 108 is divided, such as in half, third, quarter, or twelfth, so that some malas have 54, 36, 27, or 9 beads.


Jain: In the Jain religion, 108 are the combined virtues of five categories of holy ones, including 12, 8, 36, 25, and 27 virtues respectively.


Sikh: The Sikh tradition has a mala of 108 knots tied in a string of wool, rather than beads.


Chinese: The Chinese Buddhists and Taoists use a 108 bead mala, which is called su-chu, and has three dividing beads, so the mala is divided into three parts of 36 each.


Stages of the soul: Said that Atman, the human soul or center goes through 108 stages on the journey.


Meru: This is a larger bead, not part of the 108. It is not tied in the sequence of the other beads. It is the quiding bead, the one that marks the beginning and end of the mala.


Dance: There are 108 forms of dance in the Indian traditions.


Pythagorean: The nine is the limit of all numbers, all others existing and coming from the same. ie: 0 to 9 is all one needs to make up an infinite amount of numbers.


We have 108 Upanishads as per the list contained in the Muktikopanishad . Arranged them in four categories according to the particular Veda to which each of them belong. Rigveda(10): Aitareya , Atmabodha, Kaushitaki, Mudgala, Nirvana, Nadabindu, Akshamaya, Tripura, Bahvruka, Saubhagyalakshmi.


The Mystic number 108 is so sacred to ancient Indians. In all spiritual practices 108 is given utmost importance. There are 108 beads on a 'jabamala' that are counted while repeating a mantra and the equal number of names of a God or Goddess chanted during Puja.

In explaining the number of beads on a Jabamala, it is said that 108 on the number of steps a soul takes to reach the Divine with Himself. Indian knowledge ecoes it throughout. The ultimate truth is that the creation is manifested from God, sustained within God and gets dissolved in God.

The whole of creation which include heaven, galaxies, planets, stars, human beings and other creatures is created, sustained and merged accordingly in that Divine principle. There is a rythm, a pattern and discipline in the whole universe. That rythm is symbolised as "108 factor or number". And there are many spiritual and superior things hidden in "108"

I read this in one of the book and like to share this with all. I think our soul would stay in earth 108 times in different birth and body. In that birth as a human being is the most important to reach the divine. Being a human being is a gift and we should try to reach the Divine by praising and doing good things. Else the soul again be in the earth in a different creatures.

best cracker ever!

-

This particular joke won an award for the best joke in a competition
organized in Britain and this joke was sent by an Indian......

An MBA and a BE student went on a camping trip, set up their tent, and fell asleep.
Some hours later, the BE wakes his MBA friend and says
"Look up at the sky and tell me what you see."
The MBA replies, "I see millions of stars."
The BE asks, "What does that tell you?"


The MBA ponders for a minute.
"Astronomically speaking, it tells me that there are millions of galaxies
and potentially billions of planets.
Astrologically, it tells me that Saturn is in Leo.
Time wise, it appears to be approximately a quarter past three.
Theologically, it's evident the Lord is all-powerful and
we are small and insignificant.
Meteorologically, it seems we will have a beautiful day tomorrow.
What does it tell you?" the MBA asks the BE
The BE is silent for a moment, then speaks. "Practically. ..Someone has stolen our tent" .



"ENGINEERING = 100% COMMON SENSE.

This is what one has to lead his life with, only common sense comes to rescue.

Thursday, April 23, 2009

Tale to Understand - Food is the basis of character of a person

YOGI HANSRAJ AND HIS DISCIPLE


There was once a great yogi named Hamsaraj at Badrinath. He was always immersed in singing the glory of the Lord. He had a disciple who was equally earnest and sincere. That young man was pestered by a dream for a few days which gave him no peace.

In his dream he saw a fair young girl of sixteen weeping in great agony and calling out pathetically, can no one save me? The disciple was amazed at this strange dream; he could not shake off that doleful figure and that desperate cry from his mind. He recited his woes to the Master.

Hamsaraj, by his viveka, analysed the situation and discovered the cause of that horrid experience.He prodded the young man with such questions as: "What did you do the first day?" - "Where did you go?" - "What did you eat?" etc. It was revealed that he had gone with a friend to a feast and eaten some puris and chapatis. It was discovered that a poor brahmin had prepared the feast.

Well, Hamsaraj sent the disciple to find out why and with what resources that brahmin arranged the feast for the recluses of Badrinath. The young man cursed the day when the dream started haunting him, for he was now being sent by his Master on purposeless errands to investigate irrelevant issues; he wondered how his sadhana could be helped by all this.

Nevertheless, he went and pursued the enquiry about the feast and its origins and the wherewithal out of which it was prepared. It came to light that the funds were supplied by a sixty-year old moneylender to whom a brahmin had given his daughter in marriage and received in return a sum of ten thousand rupees. She was now appealing to the holy men for a bit of human kindness towards a forsaken child!

Hamsaraj thus demonstrated to his disciple that one should examine the source of the food, the motives for the gift and passions that surge and sway the giver before accepting such an intimate gift as food!

REFLECTION

There are subtle influences that pass into food from the persons who prepare it and handle it and are absorbed by those who eat it. Food is the basis of character. The state of the mind is conditioned by that of the body. Thus the food we take determines our character.

Mind controls one's action, and speech. Decision making ability is the important functions of a mind.Decision making ability depends upon the food we take.Vegetarian and satvic food enhances intelligence. Even though the non-vegetarian food and other rajasic foods contains some energy vital for the human body, the same energy is available more in the vegetarian foods also.

The direction we sit to take food is also important. Facing eastern direction will be good.Also, the mood of the person who is serving the food or preparing the food will affect our health. When the person who serves us food or cooks the food is in a happy mood, naturally it will reflect in the food he/she is preparing.
Not only that when we take that food it will digest easily and we can also enjoy the real deliciousness of the food. If the person cooks or serves with angry, decease, depressed mind, lust, hatred, then even the nutritious containing in the food become useless to us and cause more problems like indigestion, etc.

So one should always eat only satvic and healthy food as it would definitely have a great impact on our mind and character for the good. Eat healthy and stay healthy!

"Everyday, when you take food you are offering eatables to the fire that God has put in you to digest food. You have to eat in a prayerful mode, in profound gratitude. The Gîtâ says that the fire which cooked the meal is God; the meal is God; the eater is God; the purpose of eating is to carry on the work entrusted by God or pleasing to God; and the fruit of that work is progress towards God." - Bhagavan Sathya Sai Baba

The evil you do remains with you the good you do comes back to you

A WOMAN BAKED CHAPPATIS for members of her family and an extra one for a hungry passerby. She kept the extra chappati on the window-sill, for whosoever would take it away. Everyday, a hunchback came and took away the chappati. Instead of expressing gratitude, he muttered the following words as he went his way: "The evil you do, remains with you: The good you do, comes back to you!" This went on, day after day. Everyday, the hunch-back came, picked up the chappati and uttered the words: "The evil you do, remains with you: The good you do, comes back to you!"

The woman felt irritated. "Not a word of gratitude," she said to herself. "Everyday this hunchback utters this jingle! What does he mean?"

One day, exasperated, she decided to do away with him. "I shall get rid of this hunchback," she said. And what did she do? She added poison to the chappati she prepared for him! As she was about to keep it on the window sill, her hands trembled. "What is this I am doing?" she said. Immediately, she threw the chapati into the fire, prepared another one and kept it on the window- sill. As usual, the hunchback came, picked up the chappati and muttered the words: "The evil you do, remains with you: The good you do, comes back to you!" The hunchback proceeded on his way, blissfully unaware of the war raging in the mind of the woman.

Everyday, as the woman placed the chappati on the window-sill, she offered a prayer for her son who had gone to a distant place to seek his fortune. For many months, she had no news of him. She prayed for his safe return.

That evening, there was a knock on the door. As she opened it, she was surprised to find her son standing in the doorway. He had grown thin and lean. His garments were tattered and torn. He was hungry, starved and weak. As he saw his mother, he said, "Mom, it's a miracle I'm here. While I was but a mile away, I was so famished that I collapsed. I would have died, but just then an old hunchback passed by. I begged of him for a morsel of food, and he was kind enough to give me a whole chappati. As he gave it to me, he said, "This is what I eat everyday: today, I shall give it to you, for your need is greater than mine!"

As the mother heard those words, her face turned pale. She leaned against the door for support. She remembered the poisoned chappati that she had made that morning. Had she not burnt it in the fire, it would have been eaten by her own son, and he would have lost his life! It was then that she realized the significance of the words: "The evil you do, remains with you: The good you do, comes back to you!"

Resource utilization

Resource utilization

Buddha, one day, was in deep thought about the worldly activities and the ways of instilling goodness in human beings. One of his disciples approached him and said humbly " Oh my teacher ! While you are so much concerned about the world and others, why don't you look in to the welfare and needs of your own disciples also."

Buddha: "OK... Tell me how I can help you"

Disciple: "Master! My attire is worn out and is beyond the decency to wear the same. Can I get a new one, please?"

Buddha found the robe indeed was in a bad condition and needed replacement. He asked the storekeeper to give the disciple a new robe to wear on. The disciple thanked Buddha and retired to his room. A while later, he went to his disciple's place and asked him "Is your new attire comfortable? Do you need anything more?"

Disciple: "Thank you my Master. The attire is indeed very comfortable. I need nothing more"

Buddha: "Having got the new one, what did you do with your old attire?"

Disciple: "I am using it as my bed spread"

Buddha: "Then…hope you have disposed off your old bed spread"

Disciple: " No.…no… master. I am using my old bedspread as my window curtain"

Buddha: " What about your old Curtain?"

Disciple: "Being used to handle hot utensils in the kitchen"

Buddha: "Oh… I see… Can you tell me as to what has been done with the old cloth they used in kitchen?"

Disciple: "They are being used to wash the floor."

Buddha: " Then, the old rug being used to wash the floor...?"

Disciple: " Master, since they were torn off so much, we could not find any better use, but to use as a
twig in the oil lamp, which is right now lit in your study room...."

Buddha smiled in contentment and left for his room.

If not to this degree of utilization, can we at least attempt to find the best use of all our resources at home and in office?

We need to handle wisely, all the resources earth has bestowed us with.... both natural and material…so that they can be saved for the generations to come…

Let recession not be the only thing that urges us to save! Let us be proactive


PROBLEMS in life should be perceived as ......
Purposeful Roadblock Offering Beneficial Lessons to Enhance Mental Strength

Sardar replies to impossible questions(super)

TEACHER : Maria, go to the map and find NorthAmerica.
MARIA : Here it is!
TEACHER : Correct.. Now class, who discoveredAmerica?
CLASS : Maria!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __
TEACHER : Why are you late, Frank?
FRANK : Because of the sign.
TEACHER : What sign?
FRANK : The one that says,"School Ahead, Go Slow."

____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __
TEACHER: John, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
JOHN : You told me to do it without using tables!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __
TEACHER : Glenn, how do you spell "crocodile?"
GLENN : K-R-O-K-O-D- A-I-L"
TEACHER : No, that's wrong
GLENN : Maybe it s wrong, but you asked me how I spell it!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __
TEACHER : Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
DONALD : H I J K L M N O!!
TEACHER : What are you talking about?
DONALD : Yesterday you said it's H toO!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________
TEACHER : Winnie, name one important thing we have today that we didn't have ten years ago.
WINNIE : Me!
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __
TEACHER : Goss, why do you always get so dirty?
GOSS : Well, I'm a lot closer to the ground than you are.
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __
TEACHER : Millie, give me a sentence startingwith "I."
MILLIE : I is...
TEACHER : No, Millie..... Always say, "Iam."
MILLIE : All right... "I am the ninth letter of the alphabet."
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __
TEACHER : Can anybody give an example of COINCIDENCE?
TINO : Sir, my Mother and Father got married on the same day, same time."
____________ _________ _________ _________ _________ _________ __
TEACHER: George Washington not only chopped down his father's cherry tree,but also admitted doing it. Now, Louie, do you know why his father didn't punish him?"
LOUIS : Because George still had the axe in his hand.

Sardar found the answer to the most difficult question ever -
What will come first, Chicken or egg?
O Yaar, what ever U order first, will come first.

A teacher told all students in a class to write an essay on a cricket match. All were busy writing except one Sardarji.
He wrote "DUE TO RAIN, NO MATCH!"

Postman: - I Have To Come 5 Miles to Deliver U This Packet
Sardar: - why did U come so far. Instead U could Have posted it....

A Sardar & his wife filed an application for Divorce.
Judge asked: How'll U divide your kids, U"VE 3 children?
Sardar replied: Ok! We'll apply NEXT YEAR

Sardar's wish: when I die, I wana die like my Grandpa who died peacefully in his sleep not Screaming like all d passengers in d car he was Driving..

A Teacher lecturing on population:
"In Indi a after every 10 secs a women gives birth to a kid. "
A Sardar stands up- "We must find & stop her!. "

A man: "Sardarji, tell me, why Manmohan Singh goes for a walk in the evening not in the morning?"
Sardarji: ''Arey bhai Manmohan is PM not AM''.

Sardar visits Chinese friend dying in hospital.
The Chinese friend just says "CHIN YU YAN" and dies.
Sardarji goes to China to find the meaning of his friend's last Words.
And finds It means "U R STANDNG ON the OXYGEN TUBE!"

Sardarji was standing in front of the mirror with his eyes closed.
His wife asked what you are doing.
He said-I am seeing how I look while sleeping.

Why did Sardar cut the sides of the capsule before taking it?
Guess what...
To avoid side effects!!!

Man: Sardarji where were U born?
Sardarji: Punjab .
Man: Which part?
Sardar: Oye part part kya kar raha hai, whole body Is born in Punjab Yaar".

Lawyer to Sardar: "Gita pe haath rakhkar kaho ke...... "
Sardar :"Yeh kya, sita pe haath lagaya to court mein Bulaya. Ab fir gita pe haath!!"

A Sardar saw a beautiful girl... He went and kissed her....
Girl said- "What R U doing...?"
Sardar replied- " B.COM from Khalsa college, Chandigar"

Sardar: For the past one week a girl is disturbing Me.
I don't know how she got my no, she interrupts whenever I call someone and says "please recharge your card"

A person went into the office kitchen one morning and found a Sardarni painting the walls. She was wearing a new fur coat and a nice denim jacket. Thinking this was a little strange, he asked her why she was wearing them rather than old clothes or an overall.
She showed him the instructions on the tin, "For Best Results put on Two Coats"

A sardar was drawing money from ATM,
The sardar behind him in the line said, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! I've seen ur password. Its 4 asterisks (****). "
The first sardar replies, "Ha! Ha! Haaa! U R wrong, Its 1258"

Q:) How do U recognize a sardar in school or College???
A:) They are the ones who erase their notebooks when the teacher erases the blackboard.. . BOLO tarara!!

Q:) Why did the sardarji sleep with a scale?
A:) Because he wanted to measure how long he has Slept....... .

Santa Singh MBBS
After finishing his MBBS, Dr. Santa Singh starts his Own practice.
He checked his first patient's Eyes, then the tongue, and finally the Ears using a torch.
Finally he said Battery is Ok !!!

Balle balle
??????? ..!!!!!!! !!!!!!!!

GOOD MANNERS IMPRESS EVERYONE

GOOD MANNERS IMPRESS EVERYONE
—Sri Swami Sivananda—


A gentleman once advertised for a young clerk to help him in his office. About fifty young men applied for the post. Many had long testimonials and strong recommendations. The gentleman selected one who had no recommendation and sent the rest away. A friend, who was sitting beside him, said, “I should like to know for what reason you choose that young man although he had no testimonials or recommendation.”

The gentleman said smilingly, “He had many testimonials and recommendations. He wiped dirt from his shoes on the doormat before entering the room. He closed the door after he had entered. He lifted up the book which I had purposely placed on the floor and put it on the table. He waited quietly for his turn while other candidates pushed each other aside. All this shows he had good manners. Are they not his testimonials and recommendations? They are. I think I have made the right choice.”

Moral: Your good manners are more valuable than testimonials and recommendations about your qualities

The लिटिल boy

The Little Boy

Sally jumped up as soon as she saw the surgeon come out of the operating room. She said: “How is my little boy? Is he going to be all right? When can I see him?”

The surgeon said, “I’m sorry. We did all we could, but your boy didn’t make it.”

Sally said, “Why do little children get cancer? Doesn’t God care any more? Where were you, God, when my son needed you?”

The surgeon asked, “Would you like some time alone with your son? One of the nurses will be out in a few minutes, before he’s transported to the university.”

Sally asked the nurse to stay with her while she said good-bye to son. She ran her fingers lovingly through his thick red curly hair.

“Would you like a lock of his hair?” the nurse asked.

Sally nodded yes. The nurse cut a lock of the boy’s hair, put it in a plastic bag and handed it to Sally. The mother said, “It was Jimmy’s idea to donate his body to the university for study. He said it might help somebody else. “I said no at first, but Jimmy said, ‘Mom, I won’t be using it after I die. Maybe it will help some other little boy spend one more day with his Mom.” She went on, “My Jimmy had a heart of gold. Always thinking of someone else. Always wanting to help others if he could.”

Sally walked out of Children’s mercy Hospital for the last time, after spending most of the last six months there. She put the bag with Jimmy’s belongings on the seat beside her in the car. The drive home was difficult. It was even harder to enter the empty house. She carried Jimmy’s belongings, and the plastic bag with the lock of his hair to her son’s room. She started placing the model cars and other personal things back in his room exactly where he had always kept them. She laid down across his bed and, hugging his pillow, cried herself to sleep.

It was around midnight when Sally awoke. Laying beside her on the bed was a folded letter. The letter said:

“Dear Mom, I know you’re going to miss me; but don’t think that I will ever forget you, or stop loving you, just ’cause I’m not around to say I LOVE YOU. I will always love you, Mom, even more with each day. Someday we will see each other again. Until then, if you want to adopt a little boy so you won’t be so lonely, that’s okay with me. He can have my room and old stuff to play with. But, if you decide to get a girl instead, she probably wouldn’t like the same things us boys do. You’ll have to buy her dolls and stuff girls like, you know. Don’t be sad thinking about me. This really is a neat place. Grandma and Grandpa met me as soon as I got here and showed me around some, but it will take a long time to see everything. The angels are so cool. I love to watch them fly. And, you know what? Jesus doesn’t look like any of his pictures. Yet, when I saw Him, I knew it was Him. Jesus himself took me to see GOD! And guess what, Mom? I got to sit on God’s knee and talk to Him, like I was somebody important. That’s when I told Him that I wanted to write you a letter, to tell you good-bye and everything. But I already knew that wasn’t allowed. Well, you know what Mom? God handed me some paper and His own personal pen to write you this letter. I think Gabriel is the name of the angel who is going to drop this letter off to you. God said for me to give you the answer to one of the questions you asked Him ‘Where was He when I needed him?’ “God said He was in the same place with me, as when His son Jesus was on the cross. He was right there, as He always is with all His children.

Oh, by the way, Mom, no one else can see what I’ve written except you. To everyone else this is just a blank piece of paper. Isn’t that cool? I have to give God His pen back now. He needs it to write some more names in the Book of Life. Tonight I get to sit at the table with Jesus for supper. I’m, sure the food will be great.

Oh, I almost forgot to tell you. I don’t hurt anymore. The cancer is all gone. I’m glad because I couldn’t stand that pain anymore and God couldn’t stand to see me hurt so much, either. That’s when He sent The Angel of Mercy to come get me. The Angel said I was a Special Delivery! How about that?

Signed with Love from: God, Jesus & Me.

Wednesday, April 22, 2009

revere parents and receive god's grace

Once when Adi Sankara’s parents were to leave the house for some work, his father instructed him thus, “My dear son, you know that I daily worship the Goddess in our house and later distribute the naivedya (offerings) to all the people. Similarly, when your mother and I are away, will you please make the offering to Goddess?” The obedient son that Sankara was he immediately agreed to fulfill his father’s commands. And so after his parents left, he poured some milk into a cup and kept it before the idol of the Goddess and prayed to her “Mother! Please accept this milk which I am offering”. But despite his fervent prayers, the Mother neither took the milk, nor did she appear. The young boy was understandably disappointed, but did not give up. He prayed again, “Mother! Mother! You accept the offerings that my father makes to your daily! What sins have these hands of mine committed that you are not accepting the offering which I am giving to you?”


He continued to pray to her earnestly from the innermost depths of his heart, so much so that he was even prepared to sacrifice his life! Sankara told himself, “My father asked me to offer this milk to the goddess but I am not able to do so because the goddess is not receiving the offering, which I made. It is better that I die”. He went out and brought a big stone to kill himself. But the compassionate Mother, the Mother of the Universe could not keep herself away for too long.

Moved by Sankara’s unsullied devotion and sincerity, she at once appeared before him and drank the milk that he had offered and then placed the empty cup before him. The boy was very glad that the Mother of the Universe came and drank the milk. But now there was nothing left in the cup.

He thought that his father would certainly ask for the naiveidya (consecrated offering) of the God when he returned. He feared that the father may think that he drank away all the milk and hence may become angry with him. And therefore he prayed to the Goddess again.

This time asking her, “O Mother, Please give me at least a drop of milk so that I may be able to give it to my father”. But the Goddess did not come. He again sincerely continued to pray; the Goddess was yet again moved by his love and faith and she appeared before him. But since she was not able to give the milk that she drank, she gave her own milk and filled the cup!

It is believed that because Sankara was blessed to taste the Divine milk, he could attain the highest pinnacle of knowledge and wisdom. But the main essence of the story lies in the son’s blind and complete devotion to fulfill his father’s wishes. Because Sankara tried hard to please his father, he was able to get the Goddess of the Universe to manifest Herself before him.

Revering and obeying the orders of our parents hence is but only a way to earn the grace and blessings of our divine parent.

Don't copy if you can't paste!

A popular motivational speaker was entertaining his audience. He said: "The best years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who wasn't my wife!"
The audience was in silent and shocked.
The speaker added: "And that woman was my mother!"
Laughter and applause.




A week later, a top manager trained by the motivational speaker tried to crack this very effective joke at home. He was a bit foggy after a drink.
He said loudly, "The greatest years of my life were spent in the arms of a woman who was not my wife!"
The wife was stunned and enraged.



Standing there for 20 seconds trying to recall the second half of the joke, the manager finally blurted out: "... And I can't remember who she was!"



Moral of the story: Don't copy if you can't paste!

Laugh....Laugh....Laugh....‏

Once Sardarji was in Germany.He attended a party.The host, at the start called out, with a piece of chicken, in his hand,"This is in memory of Napolean...Bone. ...apart" .The crowd applauded at the pun.
Sardarji comes home and throws a party.He also holds a Tandoori chicken in hand and hollers out "Napoleon... ..Napolean".Looks around the crowd, which is silent(?).Disgusted ly he turns around and tells his friend "Aare yar Nobody aprreciates a joke here, whereas in Germany the whole lot appreciated the same joke"


Election form to be filled in by all candidates

Application Form For "Lok Sabha Election"

1. Name of Candidate: ____________ _________

2.Present Address:
(i.)Name of Jail: ____________ _________
(ii.)Cell Number: ____________ _________



3.Political Party: ____________ _________


*List ONLY the Last Five parties in Chronological (Order)

4.Sex: [ ]
A- Male
B- Female
C- Mayawati
D- Uma Bharathi

5.Nationality: [ ]
A- Italian
B- Indian

6.Reasons for leaving last party (circle one or more)
A- Defected
B- Expelled
C- Bought out
D- None of above
E- All of above

7.Reasons for contesting elections (circle one or more)
A- To make money
B- To escape court trial
C- To grossly misuse power
D- To serve the public
E- I have no clue
(If you choose "D, attach Certificate of Sanity from a
Recognized Government Psychiatrist)

8.How many years of public service experience do you possess?
A- 1-2 yrs
B- 2-6yrs
C- 6-15yrs
D- 15+yrs

9.Give details of any criminal cases pending against you (Use as many Additional Sheets as you want)

10.How many years have you spent in Jail? [ ]
(Do not confuse with question 8)
A- 1-2 years
B- 2-6 years
C- 6-15 years
D- 15+years

11.Are you involved in any financial scams? [ ]
A- Why not
B- Of Course
C- Definitely
D- I deny it all
E- I see a foreign hand.

12. What is your Annual Corruption Income? [ ]
A- 100-500 Crores
B- 500-1000 Crores
C- Overflow...
(Convert all your $ earning from Hawala etc to Rupees)

13. Do you have any developmental plans for India in mind? [ ]
A- No
B- No
C- No
D- No

14.Describe your achievements in space provided:
[_________]

Issued in public interest by Election Commission of India.



7 reasons not to mess with children.


A little girl was talking to her teacher about whales.
The teacher said it was physically impossible for a whale to swallow a human because even though it was a very large mammal its throat was very small.
The little girl stated that Jonah was swallowed by a whale.
Irritated, the teacher reiterated that a whale could not swallow a human; it was physically impossible.
The little girl said, 'When I get to heaven I will ask Jonah'.
The teacher asked, 'What if Jonah went to hell?'
The little girl replied, 'Then you ask him'.


A Kindergarten teacher was observing her classroom of children while they were drawing. She would occasionally walk around to see each child's work.
As she got to one little girl who was working diligently, she asked what the drawing was..
The girl replied, 'I'm drawing God.
The teacher paused and said, 'But no one knows what God looks like.'
Without missing a beat, or looking up from her drawing, the girl replied, 'They will in a minute.'


One day a little girl was sitting and watching her mother do the dishes at the kitchen sink. She suddenly noticed that her mother had several strands of white hair sticking out in contrast on her brunette head.
She looked at her mother and inquisitively asked, 'Why are some of your hairs white, Mummy?'
Her mother replied, 'Well, every time that you do something wrong and make me cry or unhappy, one of my hairs turns white.'
The little girl thought about this revelation for a while and then said, 'Mummy, how come ALL of grandma's hairs are white?'


The children had all been photographed, and the teacher was trying to persuade them each to buy a copy of the group picture.
'Just think how nice it will be to look at it when you are all grown up and say, 'There's Jennifer, she's a lawyer,' or 'That's Michael, He's a doctor.'
A small voice at the back of the room rang out, 'And there's the teacher, she's dead.'


A teacher was giving a lesson on the circulation of the blood. Trying to make the matter clearer, she said, 'Now, class, if I stood on my head, the blood, as you know, would run into it, and I would turn red in the face.'
'Yes,' the class said.
'Then why is it that while I am standing upright in the ordinary position the blood doesn't run into my feet?'
A little fellow shouted,
'Cause your feet ain't empty.'


The children were lined up in the cafeteria of a Catholic elementary school for lunch. At the head of the table was a large pile of apples. The nun made a note, and posted on the apple tray:
'Take only ONE . God is watching.'
Moving further along the lunch line, at the other end of the table was a large pile of chocolate chip cookies.
A child had written a note, 'Take all you want. God is watching the apples.'

FLAWS We each have that make Our Lives Together

An elderly Chinese woman had two large pots, each hung on the ends of a pole, which she carried across her neck.

One of the pots had a crack in it while the other pot was perfect and always delivered a full portion of water At the end of the long walk from the stream to the house, the cracked pot arrived only half full.

For a full two years this went on daily, with the woman bringing home only one and a half pots of water.

Of course, the perfect pot was proud of its accomplishments.

But the poor cracked pot was ashamed of its own imperfection, and miserable that it could only do half of what it had been made to do.

After 2 years of what it perceived to be bitter failure, it spoke to the woman one day by the stream I am ashamed of myself, because this crack in my side causes water to leak out all the way back to your house The old woman smiled, “Did you notice that there are flowers on your side of the path, but not on the other pot’s side?

That’s because I have always known about your flaw, so I planted flower seeds on your side of the path, and every day while we walk back, you water them “For two years I have been able to pick these beautiful flowers to decorate the table.”

Without you being just the way you are, there would not be this beauty to grace the house.”

Each of us has our own unique flaw…

But it’s the cracks and flaws we each have that make our lives together so very interesting and rewarding You’ve just got to take each person for what they are and look for the good in them.

To all of my crackpot friends, have a great day and remember to smell the flowers, on your side of the path.

Monday, April 20, 2009

Awesome Math...........

============ ========= ========= ========= ========= =====
Equation 1

Human = eat + sleep + work + enjoy
Donkey = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Human = Donkey + work + enjoy

Therefore,
Human - enjoy = Donkey + work

In other words,
Humans who don't enjoy = Donkey that works
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= =====

Equation 2

Men = eat + sleep + earn money
Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Men = Donkeys + earn money

Therefore,
Men - earn money = Donkeys

In other words,
Men that don't earn money = Donkeys
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= =====

Equation 3

Women = eat + sleep + spend
Donkeys = eat + sleep

Therefore,
Women = Donkeys + spend

Therefore,
Women - spend = Donkeys

In other words,
Women that don't spend = Donkeys
============ ========= ========= ========= ========= =====

To Conclude:

From Equation 2 and Equation 3
Men that don't earn money = Women that don't spend.

So, Men earn money not to let women become Donkey

============ ========= ========= ========= ========= =====


“Vision without action is a daydream. Action without vision is a nightmare.”